Tag Archives: bad music

WTF Album Covers: The Everlasting Horror of Wendy Bagwell

I don’t know who Wendy Bagwell is, but the utter horror of these album covers is plenty, thanks. Suitable for framing. In HELL. Look at those grotesque rictus grins! Who was applying the leeches during this photo shoot? And more importantly, WHERE? Not to mention the utterly Beavis & Butthead snickers the album title lends itself to.

But wait, the horror doesn’t stop here! More awfulness…

WTF Album Covers: Raven The Pack Is Back

Brace yourself; what follows is one of the most brain-twistingly wrongheaded album covers in heavy metal history. What WERE these lunks thinking when they approved THIS image to sell their album for Atlantic Records?

WOW! This is a staggering achievement. It manages to be cheesy, stupid, AND sports related at the same time! According to the legend of this pile of flaming crap, a corporate label hack got a hold of this band, pressured them to make the record as commercial as possible and these poor metal schmucks wound up having HORNS and KEYTARS overdubbed on their record.

I’m no fan of metal, but I can sympathize with a band that has its musical vision turned into the sonic equivalent of Sesame Street but a guy in a necktie. Poor, misguided Raven. They should have told the photographer AND the corporate hack to get stuffed…but what can you do? Except brace yourself for inclusion in the Hall of Shame.

WTF Bad Album Covers: The Worst So Far?

WTF bad album covers mazaradi fox and the dumoutsby Joe Wallace

There are some people who tell me that picking on rap albums is like shooting fish in a barrel. There are so very many bad album covers in the rap, hip hop, metal, and singer/songwriter genres that it’s almost a cop-out to post one in any of these genres. You wouldn’t believe how many album covers I turn down for posting here because they just aren’t rotten enough.

And then there’s this one. Another example of truth in advertising in the genre, the band has the word “dumb” in its name so you already know what to expect–contentwise we’re probably talking the equivalent of a lyric sheet from any Blink 182 record. You want deep thoughts? Go read some James Joyce. If you’re looking for utter bewilderment, this is a fine and dandy album cover to gaze upon.

What’s the deal with the dude holding the machete? The One Way sign over the thanksgiving turkey makes me think of food poisoning for some reason…and the tilty baseball caps make these gents look like grade school kids out ready to go running after the ice cream truck. Hard core street survivors? Not on this album cover. More like Leave It To Beaver. Tomorrow I’ll look at this and think that the guy on the bottom left looks like Cat from Red Dwarf, but today it’s all about the ice cream truck. Maybe I’ve been listening to far too much KLF for my own good.

I imagine the conversation about this picture going something like this. “Hey, we gotta get a COVER on this mess. What do you want to put on it? I’m thinking about turkeys. And place settings. And big fluffly clouds. But make sure you get some mad faces on there too so people don’t think we’re a bunch of sissies.”

WTF Bad Album Covers: Predator Easy Prey

predator easy prey vinyl album WTF bad album coversby Joe Wallace

Easily one of the most offensive album covers of all time, the Predator Easy Prey vinyl album defies logic–IF the guiding principle of album artwork is to sell the music inside. “Hey kids, buy this record–it’s about SEXUAL ASSAULT!”

What were these lunkheads thinking when they came up with THIS crap? It’s difficult to blame the band 100% on this one–the fault rests squarely with the record label, Metal Blade Records if an interview with Predator’s Jeff Prentice is to be believed. Prentice was interviewed by Sleazegrinder.com, saying “I laughed my ass off that they actually used it. Talk about low budget!” Prentice added, “It was all in good fun. Nowadays the politically correct liberal f*cks would be all over it. Heh heh.”

Some would counter that by saying that it’s not so much a question of political correctness per se, but rather the idea that–as presented on the cover and the infamous back cover (see below) the band might be misinterpreted as saying “We don’t actually have a problem with this.” Or maybe they’re saying, “We like hot chicks in beachwear, but didn’t have the balls to just show that cuz it’s like, you know, not METAL enough. Party on, Garth.”

Prentice nyuk nyuks about this cover, but the presentation actually would have been far more interesting if the roles were reversed on the back cover of the LP instead of what we get here:

predator back cover vinyl

But it’s not really Turntabling’s gig to discuss effing philosophy of art with this crap–it’s more about first impression factors and whether the album art does its job well. If you spot THIS winner in the shops, do you want to BUY it? Continue reading WTF Bad Album Covers: Predator Easy Prey