by Joe Wallace

For the record–I put very little stock in many of these “learn how to DJ” tutorials. Learn to mix and scratch like a pro? I’ve got a better idea–why not teach yourself how to mix and scratch and become a pro? Watching somebody in a goofy hat turntabling on a DVD isn’t my idea of a good time.

That said, I was intrigued by the lineup on the DJ Series Digital Scratching and Mixing DVD. This disc boasts interviews with Robert Moog, Herbie Hancock, and Wally Callerio, just to name a few. What does Robert Moog say on the DVD? I’m intrigued, since in my mind he’s the Godfather of analog synth goodness. Herbie Hancock isn’t such a stretch, but Moog is the wildcard here, at least to me.

If you’ve seen this, by all means drop a comment here–I’d love to know if the Moog thing is a goofy name-dropping ten second cameo or if it’s a quality interview worth the price of the disc to see…

Has anyone read this? It seems like the sort of thing we should be selling or at least discussing here on Turntabling, since the turntable is still a big part of DJing even if you’re running time code vinyl. Truth be told, I’ve never read The Mobile DJ Handbook, and would be very interested to know what experienced pros think of it before I took the leap. Sure, I could buy a copy and read for myself, but I know SOMEBODY out there has to have picked this up at some point.

What I CAN do is to dispense a bit of advice from my own experiences as a DJ–mobile and otherwise. Thinking about taking the plunge? Read on.

Me personally, I HATED mobile DJing for one simple reason. It wasn’t focused enough. If you want to make it as a mobile DJ, you should probably be willing to do a country set, jazz, whatever Jimbo and his party buds want you to play.

I don’t mind a bit of that, but I prefer to pick a genre or three and specialize in those sounds, catering to people who show up expecting to hear them. A wedding or birthday party can be a real drag because there’s always somebody there who wants you to mix Madonna with Merzbow or isn’t happy until they can do the Humpty Dance AND the Macarena back to back.

Thanks, but no thanks.

If you really don’t mind any of that, I strongly suggest three things. Get a sound system (or plan on renting one) that has the juice to fill the room you’re spinning in. Don’t buy small. Buy larger than you expect to need–you’ll outgrow it soon enough. Skimp on the speaker size and the amp power and you’ll regret it quickly.

Second, use a laptop with a mobile internet connection to download those MP3s you get requests for but don’t own (that moment). Do NOT use MP3s encoded at low bitrates. Get the highest quality you can when you download.

Third–do NOT rely on that laptop to run your whole DJ set. It WILL fail on you, Murphy’s Law insists on that happening. Instead, run your MP3s off DVD or CDrs. Don’t rely on your hard drive, especially around all those lovely magnets in a big sound system. Yeah, running MP3s off disc is a pain in the arse. But you’ll thank me later.

Buy a good mic–a Shure SM57 or 58 should do fine, but make sure you have a feedback killer in your rack just in case.

Finally, a DJ is someone who spins. Don’t sit around NOT spinning when you’re trying to find work. Keep your skills sharp or at least developing. Don’t sit around for two weeks not spinning then try to go out and play a set. Doesn’t help your confidence or your performance at all.

Oh–one last bit of advice. It’s by NO MEANS required or necessary, but if you can get a part time gig at a local radio station spinning, it increases your audience base AND gives you a great networking tool at the same time. Don’t worry about it if you can’t land a radio gig, but it’s a DAMN fine way to get more contacts and boost your street cred specifically as a mobile DJ.

With that in mind, this book IS getting rave reviews. You have to recognize the ambition of a book that starts off discussing the earliest record player including the 1857 French invention of the phonoautograph and Edison’s 1877 invention of the wax cylinder phonograph.

I am constantly amused by all the Learn How to DJ websites I run across. I especially giggle at the sites that tell newcomers that they should invest in two turntables as part of their DJ rig as though that’s still standard, required equipment these days. It’s not that you can’t or shouldn’t expect to play vinyl as a professional DJ but every DJ interview you read these days says the same thing. “Vinyl is too heavy. I held out for a long, long time but finally switched to MacBook Pro and Serato.”

One thing I personally am in favor of is using the turntable to enhance your digital setup. You can go digital all day long, but sometimes you have the urge to whip out that old Laid Back “White Horse” 12 inch and mix it up with some Radioactive Goldfish. So why not buy yourself a Technics SL-1200 MK2 and get crazy with the cheese whiz?

When you learn how to DJ the first thing you discover is the gear isn’t going to make you spin any better. I’ve run four hour broadcasts using two clapped-out old decks with half-dead LED displays and played DJ sets using the most shameful home stereo craptacular setup you can imagine. What really matters is does the music sound good, loud enough and is it mixed well?

But I will say this–there is absolutely no replacement for actual, physical media at a club or party. When your laptop bites the dust at the last minute, or that hard drive crashes, or worse yet–your computer simply stops recognizing the hard drives you stored all your tunes on, you’ll be greatful for vinyl or CDs and the players to run ‘em on. Don’t overestimate your digital gear–one day it will take a nice big dirt nap on you when you need it most. Will you be ready to pick up the slack? Steve Albini is right–the future does belong to analog loyalists, even if only for those who were smart enough to pack some vinyl and a player for when their laptops quit working at the show.

The DJ Sales and Marketing Handbook starts off the list. So far, so good, right? Learn how to set up and get paid to party! That’s what author Stacy Zemon wants you to do. Why the hell not? Now granted, being a club DJ is alot different than being a MOBILE DJ, but a lot of people find the party DJ route easier to get into and they transition to clubs later. Not a bad career path if you ask me…

The Complete Guide To Remixing is probably a good bet, as long as you’re buying DJ how to books. After all, what good’s a DJ who can’t remix on the fly?

Then, there’s THIS little entry in the Amazon list of books, which surprised me on one hand, but on the other, I thought “Well damn, I guess I have some book ordering to do.” Apparently, the Amazon people understand DJ culture better than you might think:

And yes, How To Grow Exceptional Cannabis is STILL FOR SALE. Hurry, now.