Beyond the Valley of the Dolls

IFC is a wonderful thing. If you missed their recent showings of Russ Meyer’s Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, you owe it to yourself to see it somehow. The movie is utter madness. With a soundtrack that wavers back and forth between hip and laughably square, and a torrent of absolutely ridiculous dialogue (supplied by screen writer Roger Ebert!) this is the ultimate six-pack movie.

Speaking as someone who, as a kid yearned for someone to drop acid in the Brady Bunch’s water supply, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls is the perfect antidote to all of that Sherwood Schwartz 60s wholesome television goodness.

Behold!

Roy Budd: Get Carter

Morricone rightfully gets a ton of respect for his soundtracks, but by comparison fellow soundtrack wizard Roy Budd is woefully underrated. Check out this trailer for Get Carter, which features great soundtrack sounds by Budd throughout. Budd has a nice double disc set featuring some of his best work.

Get Budd: The Soundtracks is a worthy investment if you love those 60s action/heist/gangster movie sounds, or if you want to see what else Budd got up to after Get Carter. The movie itself is excellent, Michael Caine really tops himself in this…he’s the prototype for Bruce Willis, Stallone, even Arnold had to take some cues from Caine in this film.

Chuck Norris is a toffee-nosed stripling compared to Caine in Get Carter…Nobody in the entire world comes as close. Standout moments in the trailer include the totally naked Caine chasing a couple of gangsters out of his room with a shotgun…let’s see Norris try THAT. On second thought, maybe not.

Exorcist II: Electric Boogaloo

I can’t help it, I love 70s cheese, and this is by far some of the cheesiest I’ve seen as of late. Listen to that music! Damn…my favorite part is the cornball little new wavey splash/splat after the chorus girls stop singing. “Skashhhhhhhhhhhhh”. Brilliant.

Here’s the trailer in all its’ wretchedly goofy glory. Remember, kid, this one stars James Earl Jones, Richard Burton, and Max Von Sydow–an all star cast. Darth Vader, the guy who played chess with Death, and Bluebeard together–what a hoot. I wish we could go back to the time that these movies were released, when people still thought the Devil was scary. Of course, all you have to do is look at those clothes to know just how misguided they really were–Satan was the least of their problems. Unless your name was Linda Blair.

That Pizza Does NOT Look Appetizing

Back in the days when vinyl records and turntables were in widespread, everyday use, people didn’t have the Internet, cell phones or TiVo. People used to get into their cars and drive to outdoor theaters, make out, smoke a spliff and watch a double feature. Drive-in culture was fun, and some drive-ins survive to this day–including the 66 Drive-In located in Springfield, Illinois, another near Dayton Ohio, and yet another–the Mission Drive-In just on the outskirts of San Antonio, Texas. I’m sure there are more, but those are three that I’ve actually been to.

In case you haven’t guessed by now, I’m a fan of a lot of retro culture, not just LPs and turntable-related stuff. One of the things I love about the cult of both modern and retro turntables is the preponderance of the “What were they THINKING?” factor. (And the legitimately cool stuff is nice, too.)

When it comes to retro drive-in culture, I can think of no better example of that than this clip: