WTF: Vinyl Vulgarity and 8-Track Smut?

by Joe Wallace

This post is perhaps not terribly safe for work. You have been warned.

I am a follower of author William Gibson on Twitter, and recently he mentioned finding 8-track tape erotica at southern truck stops. The very idea of this was mind-numbing. Could such weirdness actually exist?

Apparently it’s not enough to get naughty videos and vinyl records. Somebody decided there was DEFINITELY a market for dirty goings on delivered via eight-track tape.

The concept seems so odd that I became obsessed with seeing them for myself. What do these things look like? Who buys them? What on earth do they get out of them? Well, that’s a totally stupid, harebrained question as we all know what you get out of them.

But looking at the packaging for 8-track tape pronorama makes me think that the very last thing on earth these would do is turn somebody on. Thinking of somebody producing smut for an 8-track audience doesn’t make me envision high production values…it makes me visualize a corrugated tin shack somewhere with a Radio Shack microphone dangling from the ceiling while a couple of 19-year old high school dropouts force out grunts and wheezes between shifts at the local In-N-Out Burger.

No pun intended.

I mention all that to say that after being turned on (heh) to the concept of 8-track tape erotica, I actually found some images of these no doubt classics of the recording industry:

And according to William Gibson’s Twitter posts, if I read him correctly you can STILL PURCHASE THESE DAMN THINGS as under-the-counter, on-the-sly finds in the deep south.

Let me repeat, I am certainly no prude–you should be able to listen to any damn thing in any old format you want as long as your eyes are on the road and BOTH HANDS are on the wheel. But these can’t POSSIBLY raise so much as an eyebrow, can they? Not having heard them, I’m guessing they’re as erotic as a reading of De Sade’s 101 Nights Of Sodom by Ted “Lurch” Cassidy.

Ernest Tubb Record Shop, Nashville Texas

Some landmarks are as much about preserving the mystique and furthering the legend of a place or person as they are about anything else. Nashville’s Ernest Tubb Record Shop is definitely tops in both of those departments.

You might not know a damn thing about Ernest Tubb, but by the time you leave the record store you’ll have gotten a quick education about the man and his work in the era when the music industry supported “both kinds”, country AND western.

For those new to Nashville, it becomes clear that Broadway is the street where a good chunk of country tourist attractions are located, including the Ernest Tubb store. It’s kind of hard to miss once you get near 417 Broadway:

Once you get inside, you enter a world of 100% pure country music, nostalgia for “the good old days” of AM radio, those huge microphones, and ten gallon hats. It may be Ernest Tubb’s record shop, but it’s hard not to think of the other crooners when you see the decor. Gene Autry springs instantly to mind; the ghosts of Dale Evans and Roy Rogers are hard to shake in here.

Almost as if store organizers know this is happening, there are constant reminders all over the store about Tubb and his work.

You wouldn’t be wrong in thinking of this place as a sort-of museum for music as enjoyed in the pre-internet, AM radio era. It’s fascinating to think about what these recording artists would make of today’s totally decentralized music landscape as compared to the “only game in town” type environment they worked in so long ago.

One interesting sign of the times–the Ernest Tubb Record Shop doesn’t have a staggering collection of records.

Compact discs far outnumber the vinyl, or at least that’s the impression you get looking around the shop. There’s only one section of vinyl records to browse through, and the official site pushes the CD format very hard. No vinyl at all mentioned on the front page. For vinyl junkies this is practically sacrilege, but perhaps it’s more about what the tourists want.

And what they likely want is some souvenir of Ernest Tubb without having to lug around 12 inches of vinyl all day.

So the Ernest Tubb Record Shop might have a bit of a misleading name for vinyl purists and collectors, but really the store isn’t set up for the vinyl junkie. It’s all about the Cult of Tubb.

If you’re into the mystique, the myth making and the ghost of a music genre that doesn’t really exist like that any more, this shop is definitely a must-see. You won’t need a TARDIS to go back in time here.

–Joe Wallace

PS: I regularly update the WTF Records Facebook page with bad records and news of progress on the WTF book. Why not join me there? You can also get snark and vinyl obsessiveness by friending me on my personal FB page. which doubles as the Turntabling FB presence.

Vinyl Records For Sale From The Turntabling Collection: Halloween II, Plan 9 From Outer Space, Blue Sunshine by The Glove

The Turntabling Collection is a large, ever-growing vinyl collection curated by Turntabling. Portions of the collection go on sale to fund Turntabling.net and the Vinyl Road Rage trips that are well documented here. If you buy anything from The Turntabling Collection, you’re doing more than just filling a hole in your record collection; you’re also contributing to the site, helping us stay alive and online. Thank you!

And if you happen across this post to find these albums already sold out, please have a look at the Turntabling Collection for sale via Discogs.com. There are also select titles from the Turntabling Collection via the Turntabling Etsy shop.

The latest for-sale additions to The Turntabling Collection include the following must-have vinyl LPs:

Halloween II Soundtrack LP by John Carpenter

John Carpenter’s sequel to the original creepy classic is every bit as good, but in totally different ways. This soundtrack LP is highly sought after and with good reason–Carpenter couldn’t really go wrong at this stage in the game.

If you haven’t seen the movie in a while, have another look. Donald Pleasence is fantastic as the obsessed Dr. Loomis, and he really winds up giving the business to The Shape at the end–one of the most memorable takedowns in horror movie history.

Plan 9 From Outer Space Soundtrack Vinyl LP

How FUN is this record? For some Ed Wood fiends, you’ve got an instant party when you drop the needle. But the album sounds are only part of the fun. The packaging for this includes Bela Lugosi glowering at you from one side of the record, and Tor Johnson grimacing from the other.

So yes, this record is suitable for framing. As much as the idea makes some collectors cringe, it’s certain there ARE people out there who would rather display the Plan 9 From Outer Space soundtrack album on the wall instead of taking it for a spin on the turntable.

It’s hard to blame them when you see Lugosi’s face on the record, it really is…

The Glove Blue Sunshine Vinyl LP (SEALED)

It’s probably rare enough that you’d find a copy of this in decent condition to begin with, to find a SEALED copy of Blue Sunshine by The Glove is pretty amazing. This collaboration between The Cure’s Robert Smith and Souxsie and The Banshees’ Steve Severin is essential listening.

If you liked either group, The Glove is a worthy footnote in the history of both acts. If you aren’t convinced, there are several YouTube clips to sample, here’s just one of them–a great collision of Souxsie/Cure styles.

Landlocked Music Bloomington Indiana

by Joe Wallace

The first stop on the cross-country record store road trip we call Vinyl Road Rage was a familiar one--Landlocked Music in Bloomington, Indiana.

Bloomington is a great place to be if you’re a fan of good record stores, indie music, and weirdness overall. Landlocked Music has plenty of that–mostly found in the used soundtracks, ambient/experimental, and miscellaneous record sections. It’s easy to become a big fan of Landlocked as they’re open to a lot of musical craziness both genre-wise and in terms of format.

I found a nice selection of cassette-only projects which always makes me happy. I think today’s cassette culture people are totally nuts and I can’t imagine releasing anything on tape, which is why they are totally awesome to have around.

It’s good to see people fighting conventional wisdom so hard–AND making an interesting success of it as near as I can tell. Shine on, you crazy cassette people. (PS-I would love to know about cassette-only projects for coverage here. It’s just too retro not to do! Get in touch.)

Landlocked Music has a wonderful experimental/avant garde section that definitely needs a look if you’re a fan. I always gravitate toward the soundtrack/miscellaneous categories first as I’m a rabid collector of weird vinyl in the last couple of years.

While it’s true that I’ve covered Landlocked before, they deserve a second mention. Not only is the selection great, well-organized and fun to browse, but the staff are friendly and fun, too. The best record stores seem to have people who get it–the old cliche about folks being too cool to talk to you doesn’t exist at the really good shops I’ve found time and again.

Personality goes hand in hand with selection and Landlocked has both. Always approachable, never pretentious, and full of surprises (one visit I spotted a vinyl cutter on display and apparently for sale…) your opinion of Indiana as a vinyl destination will change after a stop here, rest assured.

Honestly, I wouldn’t go on and on about how fun and easygoing this shop is if it hadn’t been for some of the truly bizarre and unpleasant experiences I had at other shops on the road trip. When you find the awful stores, it makes places like Landlocked Music seem even more noteworthy.

Join me on Facebook as I’m quite active there and am always glad to make new friends–especially those obsessed with vinyl. Also, you can become a fan of the official Facebook page for my upcoming book WTF Records: The Turntabling Guide to Weird and Wonderful Vinyl.

Vinyl Road Rage: Making Plans For Nigel Pepper Cock

Oh dear. As Vinyl Road Rage prepares to move out of Austin and on to San Antonio, Texas, one of the most, er, unique vinyl finds so far simply demands a video clip…not safe for work by any stretch of the imagination, brace yourself for this video report featuring some rather salacious cover art.

Some sheltered or narrow-minded viewers may have difficulty with the almost exclusively male imagery on display via this record’s packaging, but that’s too bad. Live a little!

Did we mention that this clip is more or less NOT SAFE FOR WORK?

Vinyl Road Rage Day One

by Joe Wallace

Vinyl Road Rage Four is well underway–the cross country indie record store vinyl blogging trip started in Chicago and I’m now camped in a Super 8 Motel just about 40 minutes from Nashville Tennessee.

The first stop was Bloomington, Indiana for another look at TD’s CDs and LPs, plus the always wonderful Landlocked Music. Both shops are definitely worth your time if you’re anywhere near Bloomington Indiana. I’ll post more details on the first day tomorrow–it’s been a very long day, but for now, feast your eyes on my grubby little v-blog on the day’s vinyl finds. (See the Youtube clip below).

As always, I’ll be blogging about the highlights of the day and saving the in-depth record store reviews for a bit later on when I’ve had time to catch my breath. Suffice it to say that today was a long, wonderful and wonderfully weird journey. Stay tuned for the details on that…here’s the vid clip.

On these videos, bear with me, it’s a work in progress and the flaws are PAINFULLY obvious.

Vinyl Road Rage: Laurie’s Planet of Sound Chicago, Illinois

by Joe Wallace

I thought I’d kick off Vinyl Road Rage 4 with a look at a record shop right in my own back yard. Before I get behind the wheel today to hit the road for Bloomington, Indiana, Nashville and points beyond, Laurie’s Planet of Sound definitely deserves a mention.

Laurie’s is literally two blocks away from my place, which makes it very handy to indulge in some early-afternoon record shopping, and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been to Laurie’s in the past two months when I sorely needed some new, obscure or bizarro vinyl titles to write about for my book in progress WTF Records: The Turntabling Guide To Weird and Wonderful Vinyl.

And that is the real draw for me–Laurie’s carries the usual stuff with plenty of new vinyl across the expected genres plus soundtracks, imports and more. But Laurie’s absolutely excels at bringing in rarities new and used that impresses me no end. In another life, my exposure to neighborhood record stores was rather unimpressive. Since moving to Chicago proper a few years back that’s changed.

But I’ve never been so spoiled as I have been with Laurie’s so close and so well-stocked with awesomeness. I’ve scored Legendary Pink Dots vinyl, Nurse With Wound, the Blacula soundtrack, some very tasty minimal wave titles, and my all-time favorite holy grail find: Punishment of Luxury.

Laurie’s is a must-visit if you come to Chicago for a visit. They carry DVDs including a variety of off-the-beaten-track titles that are just as obsessive-worthy as the vinyl (plenty of Something Weird titles, horror movie trailer collections, drive-in exploitation and other wonderful things), and there’s even a great, eclectic book selection, too.

The shop is friendly, fun to shop, and beware what they are playing on the turntable when you walk in–chances are you’ll be walking out with it before your shopping spree is done or regret NOT buying it when you leave. I had non-buyer’s remorse for AGES after walking out without the album by Social Climbers they were playing. What was I thinking?

This jaded record store blogger HIGHLY recommends Laurie’s Planet of Sound at 4639 N Lincoln in Chicago. And be sure and tell them Turntabling.net sent you. That might make them giggle.

Dust & Grooves Video

I know I am a bit of a broken record when it comes to the rather amazing DustAndGrooves.com vinyl blog, but Eilon Paz is a true vinyl lover, skilled photographer, and now that he’s branched out into video it gives the whole Dust & Grooves experience a new dimension that’s a quite welcome addition. Great stuff and highly recommended. This particular video features a prog collector in Brooklyn, but I’m hoping for many more clips like this from D&G.

This clip is a fun supplement to the full post on Margaret Barton Fumo, vinyl collector extraordinaire.

–Joe Wallace