Two things. First, it’s clear that someone’s hand is in a “bad touch” position. Second, if you saw this album cover in the store and you bought it anyway, you’re a CHUMP. That is all.

No, wait, that is NOT all. WTF is an effing VETRILOQUIST doing with a RECORD out? Isn’t the entire schtick of working that idiotic puppet supposed to be “WOW, that puppet is REALLY TALKING! I can hardly see this dude’s lips move!”

An album with a wooden puppet is sort of like turning someone suffering from multiple personality disorder loose in the studio. You don’t really know WHO the voices are, but you’re terrified ANYWAY. Why is this guy talking to himself in that goofy voice? And what gives with wooden puppets and their dental problems? Charlie McCarthy, this dude…someone get these damn things to a cosmetic oral surgeon and FAST.
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