Category Archives: WTF?

Read The Label

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I found this at SteveCarter.com, and while the first-glance impression of this Wayne Newton LP cover is funny enough all by itself, reading the label of the LP makes the image even more priceless:

If the writing on the LP is too small for you even with your bifocals on, (and it IS too small, for sure) you will be amused/revolted to know that the LP title is “Bowel And Bladder Training”. I really, really, REALLY don’t want to know, but feel compelled to own this just the same.

And if you REALLY NEED a vinyl record to tell you about bowel and bladder training (whatever that is) I weep for you. Truly.

–Joe Wallace

WTF Records: Frank Valdor Dynamic Party Sound

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Yet another record I was foolishly prepared to dislike at based on some of the marketing art–a man seated with his trombone coming at you like Dirty Harry’s 44 Magnum–I’m actually about to purchase the Frank Valdor Dynamic Party Sound LP because the tracks are so fantastically retro-lava-lamp-swinging-hepcat-organ-groovy.

I discovered this at the wonderful blog, PCL Linkdump, which also had a Youtube clip that hooked me pretty good. It’s just a shame that the track below the next image is NOT on that album…but if the rest sounds anything like this, the retro junkie in me is hooked.

 



 
–Joe Wallace

WTF Records: Shock by the Creed Taylor Orchestra

WTF?

I was NOT prepared for how creepy and awesomely weird this vinyl record album is. Shock by the Creed Taylor Orchestra is sort of like a Mario Bava film on LP, that is really the ONLY way I can describe the cuts I’ve heard so far.

Maybe I’m impressed with this because I was expecting to hear utter, unimaginative crap–it’s the inverse cool theory or record album packaging. The more crazy hype the album cover has, the less likely it is to be interesting to cool. In spite of how not-understated this album cover is, the record comes off as being groovy, hep-cat, and sinister at the same time.

The cuts are miniature scenarios, with some sound effects, a bit of audio manipulation, and some really late 50s/60s-era Italian soundtrack sounds thrown in for good measure. Think “Blood And Black Lace” as filtered through Creed Taylor’s sensiiblities and you get what I mean.

Check it out for yourself:

 




P.S. I just discovered a most interesting blog called Scar Stuff, which has a wealth of information about this and two other records recorded in the same vein. It turns out that “Creed Taylor” is none other than film composer Kenyon Hopkins.
 
–Joe Wallace