Category Archives: editorial

WTF: Cartoon Disco

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WTF Cartoon Disco

To be fair, the bad album art is really not the main event here, though if you were going to try to sell an LP full of already unlistenable crap repackaged as disco dancefloor hits, you’d probably want to show some people actively engaged in, oh, I don’t know, DISCO DANCING?

The cover photo for this looks like the woman just brushed off a drunken groper in some sleazy snack bar; if these two are supposed to be having a good time listening to a disco-fied “Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah” it’s impossible to tell. The grimace on her face alone says “bowel surgery” instead of “hot disco fun”.

Now to the realy question. WTF made ANYONE think an album of disco versions of The Woody Woodpecker song would actually SELL? “Hey guys, here’s a great one, let’s spend $70 grand reworking Popeye The Sailor Man into a Studio 54 staple.”

The group that recorded this musical death rattle? Disco Band. they thought so much of themselves that they took the first name that came out of the engineer’s mouth. “Hey, Charlie, what do we call ourselves on this piece of crap, anyway?”

For my money, the song to kill yourself to on this record would be Chim Chim Cheree, which I’ve hated since the first time I heard it as a child. But then again, I hated cartoons at an early, early age (single digits, folks) because–get this–they weren’t VIOLENT ENOUGH.

No wonder I hate THIS with such a passion. And I LIKE disco cheese. But the idea of listening to ten seconds of Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah for any reason at all gives me the makings of my very first seizure.

Cartoon Disco Back Cover WTF

-Joe Wallace

Acid Jazz Records Strikes Again with Exile on Hammond Street

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exile on hammond street
Acid Jazz Records is a Turntabling favorite. The east London-based label doesn’t play around–from the mighty Gregory Issacs to awe-inspiring compilations like Exile on Hammond Street, Turntabling speakers are shaking to Acid Jazz grooves quite often.

Exile on Hammond Street is not a new release–it’s many years old now, but eluded Turntabling until only recently. Now that it’s in the player, let’s cut right to the chase. This is a must-own CD for any fan of mod and funk sessions featuring that classic Hammond organ sound.

If you’re not familiar with this sub-genre, I’m sure you’ve heard the Hammond sound plenty of times, usually there’s a 60s biker or acid-head movie featuring Bruce Dern sitting in a coffee shop somewhere having a casual conversation before things go really haywire with the cops, an acid flashback or a whacked out bar patron. That groovy organ wailing away in the background? This is a whole CD of those tunes.

It’s rarely possible to judge a CD based on the first thirty seconds of the disc, but in this case, just slide in Exile on Hammond Street, listen to the first half-minute of Can’t Hold Me Down by The New Mastersounds, and if you’re not hooked instantly there’s no hope for you to enjoy the rest. In instant favorite here in the Turntabling studio.

–Joe Wallace

Turntabling Wants Your Vinyl

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vinyl

It’s true. Since Turntabling has started making the rounds at horror conventions and smaller shows, the demand for tasty, tasty vinyl soundtracks and related goodness seems to have gone way up–at least round here. So I’m happy to announce that I’m in the market for vinyl collections large and small.

What we’re looking for: horror and cult movie soundtracks (just like you see selling here), Morricone, 60s and 70s softcore and euro sleaze soundtracks, French pop, disco cheese from all countries, new wave/post punk from all countries, and anything on WaxTtrax! or Mute records.

Also, anything bizarre or unusual is especially sought after. If you aren’t sure where your records fit into our want list, drop a line (see below) and we can work something out.

What we’re NOT looking for: Country, show tunes, butt rock (Journey, Scorpions, Autograph, Survivor, you get the idea) metal, classic rock, etc.

You can get in touch directly by dropping me a line at jwallace242 (at) gmail dot com. Please include a list of your titles, where you’re located, prices, etc. I’m buying large and small collections so don’t be shy.

WTF: Shrinebuilder

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WTF bad album art Shrinebuilder

Bad album covers and PR artwork both come in a variety of flavors, but the category “Ill-Advised Band Photography” is one of my favorites. The ones I see where I can hear the band talking to the photographer in my head? Priceless. This is what I heard when I spotted this winner from Shrinebuilder.

“Ok, first, like, we’re not Christian rock even though our name sure sounds like it. Second, like, make our tats really prominent in this photograph, dude. It will distract people from thinking this guy on the left looks like Janeane Garafolo.”

“Now, I’m gonna arrange my hair and hold my chin out LIKE THIS so I look exactly like Viggo Mortensen. We’re big fans of those damn hobbit movies.”

“Yeah, we KNOW these two other guys look like a high school shop teacher and Emo Phillips. Just make us two tattooed dudes look badass and we’ll call it a day.”

“Yes, Janeane Garafolo here has an I-Ching tat. Ain’t that something? He got it because that’s the sound he makes right before we start playing. He kinda hawks up a loogie and goes “eeeeee-shinnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggg!”

“Ok, now take that damn picture and make sure we got our mad faces on first.”

–Joe Wallace