Tag Archives: WTF album covers

WTF Album Covers: Before Lil’ Kim, Lil Wayne and Lil Jon…

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Before Lil’ Kim started a “mee too” bandwagon longer than your arm, here was Lil’ Richard, toiling away in some miserable little studio. And NOT the Lil Richard responsible for the utterly unlistenable “Hos on My Team”…

The REAL Little Richard would be outraged to have his identity linked in any way to an album cover so dim-witted. Just chant “duh” and go into a trance with me here as you view this thudding failure…

We’re still fixated on the me-too factor. There are far too many people with “lil” in front of their names…can’t you come up with something on your own? Apparently not if your name is:

Lil Romeo, Lil Zane, Lil Fizz, Lil Flip, Lil Troy, Lil Wayne, Lil Bow Wow, Lil Mama, Lil Jon, Lil Boosie, Lil Scrappy, Lil’ Rob, Lil Whyte.

Here’s one that’s currently unclaimed, our gift to some aspiring wannabe out there who just can’t rub two brain cells together to think up a clever stage name:

Lil’ Dumbass.

WTF Album Covers: Pat Cooper

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This does NOT look like pasta sauce. It looks like Pat Cooper has committed seppuku in a gigantic pile of spaghetti. It really ought to be re-titled, Pat Cooper Commits Ritual Suicide For Laughs In the Catskills.

The cover is a riff on a Herb Alpert album cover that was popular in the day, for reasons that should be fairly obvious. Even my parents owned a copy. But then again, they also owned the soundtrack to Victory At Sea, so I shouldn’t be very surprised.

And then there’s THIS:

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WTF Album Covers: Two Atrocities that Will Damage Your Brain

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Permanent brain damage alert! Do NOT look at these album covers unless you want your visual cortex burned beyond repair. One of these lovelies is a complete first for us here at Turntabling–we’ve never featured an OPERA album cover before, but this one is certainly worthy. It demands a frame and a special place in the home, does it not?

Is that dress a Mondrian crossover atrocity? Or just some fashion designer’s idea of a sick prank? Either way, the net effect is brain seizure followed by fight-or-flight adrenaline overload as you try to violently remove your eyes from their sockets.

Next up, the special torture:

Aside from the spread-eagle lady with the pumps and her blonde spandex-wearing counterpart, this bunch looks like they just got done shooting a hard day’s work on The Electric Company or Zoom. This is one dance party I need the bottle of ether for, thanks.

WTF Album Covers: Ronnie Ronalde

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by Joe Wallace

Sometimes, these WTF album covers are chosen simply because I haven’t had enough caffeine yet when I see them and they just…set…me…off. This one was discovered during a particularly bad decaffeination headache. I snarled at the computer screen. “Yodel…OR whistle. You can’t do both at once, jackass”.

I’m on my second cup now and feeling much better. But this record still sucks. If you listen to this after seeing both the word “yodeling” and “whistler”, there’s simply no hope for you.