Monthly Archives: January 2011

Turntabling Sales

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Just a quick FYI to let everyone know we’re prepping for a bit of a change in how we do sales here–if you want to purchase something you’ve seen on Turntabling, please get in touch via e-mail first. Our stock is in flux at the moment and we’re getting ready to migrate to a new sales platform so some titles may be unavailable depending on circumstance.

Get in touch by writing orders@turntabling.net and we’ll keep you posted on further developments…

In the meantime we are selling at shows including Horrorhound Weekend and Cinema Wasteland. Details coming soon.

WTF Album Covers: Ronnie Ronalde

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by Joe Wallace

Sometimes, these WTF album covers are chosen simply because I haven’t had enough caffeine yet when I see them and they just…set…me…off. This one was discovered during a particularly bad decaffeination headache. I snarled at the computer screen. “Yodel…OR whistle. You can’t do both at once, jackass”.

I’m on my second cup now and feeling much better. But this record still sucks. If you listen to this after seeing both the word “yodeling” and “whistler”, there’s simply no hope for you.

Turntabling in HorrorHound #27 “The Sounds of Argento Part 2”

Blogs, editorial, Featured, , , ,

by Joe Wallace

Turntabling strikes again in the pages of HorrorHound magazine. In issue 27, the Vincent Price edition, you’ll find part two of my Sounds of Argento article, which has gotten some very kind words from horror soundtrack lovers across the country. THANK YOU!

Turntabling has long been proud to be associated with Horrorhound in any capacity, from simply attending the Horrorhound Weekend shows to running the Turntabling booth there, and now in the pages of HH these last two issues along with regulars Jon Kitley from Kitley’s Krypt and Matt Moore who does the always fun Tapes of Terror column.

HorrorHound doesn’t have a regular soundtrack column, but they might be tempted to add one if enough people wrote in to suggest such a thing. Drop ’em a line at contactus@horrorhound.com. In the meantime, have a look at HorrorHound #27 and not just for the Sounds of Argento article–this is a VERY solid issue!

WTF Album Covers: Bein’ Smarmy For Jesus

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Rednecks, inbreeders, peckerwoods, southern-friend jeezo-grovelers and mother-of-pearl button shirt wearing evangelist sweat machines abound, but few are as proud of their ignorance as some of THESE geniuses.

Sex…and the FEMALE? You’ve got to be kidding, right? The FEMALE? Is this guy studying Bonobo mating habits or is he talking about HUMAN FEMALES? The last time I heard anybody refer to a woman as “a female” it was right before he was about to try and make her into a meal for the happy cannibal family in some 70s slasher atrocity. This Jay Snell fellow as DAMAGE.

If the aliens spaceships made it all the way to Earth from wherever it is they’re from, if they see THIS jackass floating around in orbit around the planet, they’ll just set the deathrays to “incinerate/obliterate” and fire away without thinking twice. Look at that HAIR…we deserve to be oblivionized for tolerating this walking abomination on our Earth, and in our record stores. Did I mention that I own this?

I don’t care how much Jesus loves me, I’d never close my eyes around this guy. The look on his face in this particular image makes me think he either wants to EAT me or harvest my organs. Maybe he wants to make a pair of leather man-panties out of my flesh. Yeah, that’s the vibe I’m getting off this.

This album cover is merely lame instead of laugh-inducingly stupid, but come on, it’s Jimmy “I Have Sinned Against You” Swaggart. The man who routinely and repeatedly paid for hookers he wouldn’t even attempt to have sex with. Not only is that completely financially stupid, but…wait, it’s just plain stupid. This album would be funnier if it were DEAD From Nashville and Swaggart were made up as a zombie. But then again, he’s lived most of his life as one, so what’s the dif?

This collection of “humorous” gospel songs would be less frightening if Bob Larson didn’t look like he wants to rip off all my skin with a potato peeler and push me into a salt bath. For Jesus. The expression on his face says he’s either not getting enough fiber or getting far too much. It’s impossible to tell from this angle, but there is SOMETHING going on back there.

–Joe Wallace