Category Archives: album

Vinyl Killer Murders Hooked On Classics

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by Joe Wallace

The Vinyl Killer, known in some places as the Mini Clubman, is said to absolutely wreck any piece of vinyl it’s placed on. I have no idea if that’s accurate or not, but in this particular case we simply MUST believe it’s true because there’s no more deserving vinyl title than effing HOOKED ON CLASSICS. That’s one album that truly needs to be sandpapered into oblivion forever and ever amen.

The Vinyl Killer is basically a moving turntable needle with a mini-speaker. You place the car on the record and watch it drive around and around playing the album with varying degrees of quality and speed. It’s pretty funny in this context, but I’d keep it far away from that rare copy of the Phenomena soundtrack if I were you.

So with that in mind, I bring you this YouTube clip of the Vinyl Killer winding its way around Hooked On Classics, in hopes that the toy really and truly is wrecking those grooves beyond repair.

I have to say, the record actually sounds BETTER with the warbling, screechy sounds the Vinyl Killer ekes out…this is closer to noise music than 80s throwback awfulness:


Compared to the original release, this clip sounds AWESOME.

WTF Album Covers: Before Lil’ Kim, Lil Wayne and Lil Jon…

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Before Lil’ Kim started a “mee too” bandwagon longer than your arm, here was Lil’ Richard, toiling away in some miserable little studio. And NOT the Lil Richard responsible for the utterly unlistenable “Hos on My Team”…

The REAL Little Richard would be outraged to have his identity linked in any way to an album cover so dim-witted. Just chant “duh” and go into a trance with me here as you view this thudding failure…

We’re still fixated on the me-too factor. There are far too many people with “lil” in front of their names…can’t you come up with something on your own? Apparently not if your name is:

Lil Romeo, Lil Zane, Lil Fizz, Lil Flip, Lil Troy, Lil Wayne, Lil Bow Wow, Lil Mama, Lil Jon, Lil Boosie, Lil Scrappy, Lil’ Rob, Lil Whyte.

Here’s one that’s currently unclaimed, our gift to some aspiring wannabe out there who just can’t rub two brain cells together to think up a clever stage name:

Lil’ Dumbass.

Sick DIYers Mutilate Vinyl Records

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We’ve shown a few vids like this before, but this one is by far the SICKEST one yet for vinyl collectors, as the woman in this video not only recommends DIYers BAKE the records in an oven at home (toxic fumes, anyone?) but also encourages people to seek out COLORED VINYL to perform these mutilations to.

We’re all in favor of re-using and recycling records that are scratched, warped, and otherwise useless (how many copies of the soundtrack to No No Nanette, Flower Drum Song, and Jesus Christ Superstar do we REALLY NEED in this world?). But there’s no such caveat given in this.

Nope, she might as well be saying, “Yes, you know that acetate of The Velvet Underground’s first recording you picked up at a garage sale last summer? Go right ahead and CUT THAT MOTHER UP.”



Down With OPV? Gadget Album Covers

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It’s another installment of Other People’s Vinyl, this time featuring some albums in the collection of a YouTuber known as ColoradoSurfrider. This video is full of “gadget” album covers, each of which features a gimmick like the Rolling Stones 3-D album cover for Their Satanic Majesties Request. The most fun is the album cover for a Buddah Records, which you’ll see in a moment…



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