Category Archives: WTF?

WTF Album Covers: Jerry Colonna Music For Screaming

WTF?, , ,

WTF Bad Album Covers Jerry Colonna Music for Screaming

This wretched album cover for the Jerry Colonna album Music For Screaming couldn’t be accused of false advertising; this album cover is an accurate depiction of the mental state you’ll be in once you’ve listened to a track or two. But this record couldn’t possibly hold a candle to the promise of Dexy’s Midnight Runners Frontman Kevin Rowland, who on My Beauty barfs up versions of Daydream Believer, The Long and Winding Road, and The Greatest Love of All. In short, music for screaming–and a stunner of a bad album cover to boot!

WTF Bad Album Covers Kevin Rowland My BeautySome would call it homophobic to make fun of this album cover as it might represent someone’s attempt to come out of the closet or come to terms with their sexuality…but I put it to you that Pete Burns, Boy George, hell even Jayne County had album covers sexier than this.

Instead of some kind of bold statement, the expression on THIS guy’s face is one of somebody who got caught playing “Silence of the Lambs” in front of the mirror ala Buffalo Bill.

“Um, er…I wasn’t actually doing THE TUCK, lads. Really.”

There is more raw sex appeal in an album cover by The Mentors than this. If you’re really into the Pete Burns gender bendy concept (and why not?) here’s a VERY important tip–DITCH THE SIDEBURNS. You wouldn’t catch Annie Lennox with a pair of chops like this, and if Lemmy ever decided to give an alternative lifestyle a whirl I guarantee you he’d shave the fuzz off and never look back. Though he would look right scary in a set of pumps–Lemmy would need a pair of cycle boots regardless of which side of the street he decides to work.

WTF Bad Album Covers: Predator Easy Prey

WTF?, , , ,

predator easy prey vinyl album WTF bad album coversby Joe Wallace

Easily one of the most offensive album covers of all time, the Predator Easy Prey vinyl album defies logic–IF the guiding principle of album artwork is to sell the music inside. “Hey kids, buy this record–it’s about SEXUAL ASSAULT!”

What were these lunkheads thinking when they came up with THIS crap? It’s difficult to blame the band 100% on this one–the fault rests squarely with the record label, Metal Blade Records if an interview with Predator’s Jeff Prentice is to be believed. Prentice was interviewed by Sleazegrinder.com, saying “I laughed my ass off that they actually used it. Talk about low budget!” Prentice added, “It was all in good fun. Nowadays the politically correct liberal f*cks would be all over it. Heh heh.”

Some would counter that by saying that it’s not so much a question of political correctness per se, but rather the idea that–as presented on the cover and the infamous back cover (see below) the band might be misinterpreted as saying “We don’t actually have a problem with this.” Or maybe they’re saying, “We like hot chicks in beachwear, but didn’t have the balls to just show that cuz it’s like, you know, not METAL enough. Party on, Garth.”

Prentice nyuk nyuks about this cover, but the presentation actually would have been far more interesting if the roles were reversed on the back cover of the LP instead of what we get here:

predator back cover vinyl

But it’s not really Turntabling’s gig to discuss effing philosophy of art with this crap–it’s more about first impression factors and whether the album art does its job well. If you spot THIS winner in the shops, do you want to BUY it? Continue reading WTF Bad Album Covers: Predator Easy Prey →

WTF Bad Album Covers: Slim Goodbody The Inside Story

WTF?

WTF Bad Album Covers Sam Goodbodyby Joe Wallace

It’s been too long since a bad album cover worthy of commentary has caught my eye, but this winner was too good to pass up. To begin with, Slim Goodbody has ALWAYS creeped me out. He has the hunted look of a Turkish prison survivor just out after a stretch for trying to smuggle some of the Taliban’s finest heroin into Vatican City.

And more importantly, the thing that makes this record truly creepy besides the come hither look (who’s he trying to woo in a getup like this, one of Pinhead’s flesh-rendering pals from Hellraiser?) and the faux-mime gesturing? Well, take a damn good look at ol’ Slim Goodbody here. What’s missing?

Eunuch Goodbody is more like it.

The Most Expensive Record Ever Sold? 1966 Velvet Underground and Nico Acetate

WTF?, , , , ,

velvet underground andy warhol 1966 acetateby Joe Wallace

Since I ran a feature on what could possibly be the world’s most ridiculously expensive record needles, it was only fitting that the world’s most expensive vinyl also get a look–after all, what do you play with a record needle that cost 20 thousand dollars? How about this acetate of The Velvet Underground And Nico, which sold on eBay for more than $25,000?

An acetate, for those who don’t know about the record production process, is pressed before the master is created so vinyl records can be mass produced. It’s used as a reference so an engineer can tell how all the duplicated vinyl records will sound once they roll out of the pressing plant.

According to the fascinating Popspike.com, this acetate of The Velvet Underground And Nico was successfully auctioned on ebay for $25,200 back in 2006, making this one of THE most expensive record sales ever, right next to a rare copy of Pink Floyd’s Meddle album pressed on blue vinyl for $12K and a “SEX PISTOLS – God Save the Queen – GENUINE A&M AMS7284!” for over 12,000 British pounds.

This Velvet Underground acetate looks to be the most likely candidate to be played with the most expensive record needle in the world.