Notice that the swimsuit girls do NOT appear crowded around this guy while he has that accordion around his neck. What many people do not know is that the word “accordion” is Greek for “birth control”.
Tag Archives: bad album art
WTF Bad Album Covers: Twin Peaks, Anyone?
Does the peace of mind come from the perspective of whoever’s responsible for the dead chick on the cover wrapped in plastic? Is this the corpse of a shrewish, constantly nagging loudmouth who said one snide thing too many before being bashed over the head with an Italian glass ashtray? Or maybe this album cover is suggesting that being DEAD and WRAPPED IN PLASTIC is what gives that peace of mind? Wow…what a statement!
WTF Bad Album Covers: Dolly Parton Bubbling Over
by Joe Wallace
If I saw the disembodied head of Dolly Parton floating in MY lawn sprinkler system, I wouldn’t know whether to shoot myself in the head or start screaming for an exorcist, but one thing’s for sure–I wouldn’t stand idly by waiting for the hideous jabbering head of Dolly Parton to start uttering blasphemies in Etruscan and summoning demons in the middle of the yard.
The most WTF part of this wretched album cover is the fact that–unless my eyes deceive me–that’s Dolly Parton standing at the back of this scene, watching her OWN HEAD floating on the sprinkler spray. How effed up is THAT? What is this cover saying about the mental state of the singer?
Seems to me that Dolly Parton’s dual personality crisis has manifested itself on this album–this cover is a cry for help. “Please save me from myself!” Dolly is shrieking. That’s not a smile on her face, that’s the rictus grin of someone who has either died recently or has been injected with a lethal dose of botox and rabies.
Or it’s the facial expression of someone who GETS that the cover art concepts sucks the root, but has been held hostage by the record company. “Dolly, if you don’t do this album cover JUST THE WAY WE SAY, we’ll electrocute a puppy. AND we’ll cut off your electrolysis treatments. Got it? You WANT hairy nipples? Go ahead, give us trouble.”
WTF Bad Album Covers: Monstrosity In Dark Purity
by Joe Wallace
Oh, sweet Jesus what do we have HERE? Scary, barely legible band logos indicated the presence of METAL.
Supported by the fact that a vaguely Rob Zombie-esque sinister entity appears on the cover of this mons-turd, and it doesn’t take Sherlock Holmes or his latter day doppleganger Doctor Who to figure out that a brain clearly damaged by hours of non-stop headbanging thought this Photoshopped atrocity would be a great way to sell records.
The name of this little gem really takes the cake. “In Dark Purity“?? Why not just call it “Little House On The Prairie With Satan” and get it over with?
With a title like that, these guys HAVE to be Cookie Monster metal. I’m not listening to this to find out–we’ll save that little chore for a teeno hesher who hasn’t heard enough bad music yet. I can only judge this book by its cover…
I won’t even LOOK at the song titles, which I am sure are early-period Metallica ripoffs. I bet you a dollar there’s an Eye of the Beholder-style title, some kind of Fade to Black reference, a song about falling into a pit of despair and at least one track that makes references to conquering, crushing, or sodomizing an angel.
Go look for me, willya?