Category Archives: editorial

Apparently Jeff Bridges Really Loves Bad Album Covers

The Jeff Bridges official site (yes, THAT Jeff Bridges) has a collection of truly wretched album covers. He’s a particular fan of karate preachers, The Handless Organist (need a HEADLESS organist to create a matched set, really) and the I Love My Life guy, who oddly enough does not display this album cover on his own site. (Insert snarky observation here.) Too bad, as it’s a classic.

For those just tuning in, Jeff Bridges is not related to Todd Bridges of Diff’rent Strokes fame, but it would be pretty interesting if he was. Bridges has a singing career in the works and has appeared on more than a couple of stages and TV shows doing his brand of singer/songwriter strumming complete with backing band.

His official site is really interesting–it’s a lot more personal than your standard band page, owing mainly to the hand-drawn graphics and handwritten messages. That’s an awesome touch, and for some reason is a little reminiscent of Daniel Johnston. Don’t ask why, it’s just a first impression thing. And yes, it’s meant as a compliment.

…and We’re Back!

Was a great, sleep-deprived and vinyl-riffic road trip to Pittsburgh and back again. Loads of great vinyl finds and good times, and the two-day horror movie marathon and camp-out at the Riverside Drive-In was awesome fun. The normal Turntabling posting schedule (such as it is) resumes once more now that I’m off the road.

Learned a few interesting things about my own vinyl collecting habits while on the road. Maybe it’s just personal bias in favor of one system over another, but I find vinyl graded with terms other than the Goldmine standard (G, VG, VG+, NM, NM-, M) seem to be MUCH less than advertised when you inspect the records.

“Very Fine” and “Exceptionally Clean” seem to be much closer to bullshit in my opinion–“exceptionally clean” or “very fine” lead one to expect a record in at least VG+ or NM- condition. Instead what you get in many cases is an overpriced VG.

What’s the difference? I know a lot of people out there have a hard time with record grading, but my own criteria, fussy as it may be, is basically this: if a record has more than a couple of stray marks on it, it can’t possibly be better than VG+. If a record looks used, but well taken care of (shiny, without more than two glaring marks or scratches that don’t affect play) it’s probably VG or VG+. I think records in VG+ condition are great purchases, and many of the ones in my own collection are VG+.

I will buy a record that looks VG+ any day of the week. I love NM vinyl best of all the “pre-owned” grades, but sometimes you’ll pay more for them because they’re more sought after–a NM version of a rare title is a wonderful find. But VG+ is just fine for anyone who plans to play the record often.

Near mint is just that–a record that’s used but looks pretty damn close to when it came out of the shrink wrap with some leeway given for the age of the record. Mint is either just out of shrink wrap and played once or twice or still sealed. In my experience–and it’s all VERY subjective, naturally==I think people who collect are really into NM, but many of those who buy from me at shows like HorrorHound Weekend or Cinema Wasteland buy to play the albums often and are perfectly happy with VG+ or VG.

The records graded “Very Fine” or “Exceptionally clean”, I’m not too impressed with as the perception is (for a hardcore record buyer and seller of vinyl) that somebody’s trying to sidestep the condition issue. That’s not always the case, to be fair, but it was really glaring on this trip how untrustworthy grading systems can be. Always inspect your vinyl!

I’ll have to do a full post on this stuff a bit later on, methinks.

–Joe Wallace

WTF Album Covers: Atrocity Upon Atrocity

WTF album covers don’t have to necessarily be technically awful or tastelessly inept. They can also simply lend themselves to pure mockery by obvious double entendre titles or conceptual silliness. Look at these two beauties:

I don’t want to know about their happy hands. I do NOT want to know about their happy hands. Please don’t tell me about their happy hands.

Burning question: how much cocaine did it take for this cover to seem like a GOOD IDEA? The name of this record is “Ride A Rock Horse” but “rock” isn’t the word you’re thinking of right now. It does RHYME with “rock” though.

And finally, an open letter from the future to born again recording artists of the past. KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE EFFING PUPPETS ALREADY. Thank you.

Graham Norton Vs. The Bad Album Covers

Turntabling’s WTF collection of repellent, frightening, and just plain bad album covers is not an original concept–plenty of websites have a section devoted to them, though some like to believe that Turntabling is a bit more slavishly devoted to bad album covers than others.

Whatever the case, people LOVE crap album covers–and if YouTube is any indication, they love them a lot more than previously suspected. There’s just something really gratifying about laughing at the expense of these paragons of awfulness–who can deny the cheap yucks? Not Turntabling, and certainly not the uber-fabulous Graham Norton (a turntabling favorite) who spotlighted these familiar howlers on a recently posted edition of his show: