Category Archives: album

WTF: The Ethel Merman Disco Album

ethel merman disco album

Before you ask: we DO NOT have this monstrosity for sale in the vinyl section. The best I can do is offer you this link to the CD version of the Ethel Merman Disco Album.  Some have listened to this–and you can hear a sample below–and claim that it’s proof that there is no God. Others, like me, believe this record is a prime example of the worst cocaine-Stoli-quaalude cocktail fueled excesses of the disco generation. Ethel Merman herself supposedly hated disco and word on the street is that she recorded her vocals separately from the rest of the album.

Merman–for those of you mercifully too young to remember, was famous for show tunes. “There’s No Business Like Show Business” and that sort of thing. The modern day equivalent would be, I suppose, Josh Groban doing a gangsta rap single. Equally hideous on all fronts.

Have a listen and decide for yourself if this is the most ill-advised thing since The Star Wars Holiday Special or if it’s just another minor blip on the radar of bad taste. Continue reading WTF: The Ethel Merman Disco Album

WTF: Worst Album Cover Ever?

worst album cover of all time

I’m not saying a DAMN thing about this album cover except to ask who hates this guy so much that they let him put this photo on the cover without so much as a “Are you SURE?”

I mean, REALLY. This is one of the most cringe-making images used to sell ANYTHING, ever. The name of this record is “I’m Here” but the artwork on this one makes you want to be anywhere BUT here. There have been countless armies of people with bad judgment putting their images on albums for decades, but none so ill-advised or poorly thought out.

It goes without saying that there wasn’t an art director on this…but I hope nobody let this one hit the shelves uncontested. Continue reading WTF: Worst Album Cover Ever?

WTF: Count Your Blessings

wretched album art count your blessings

There’s so much wrong going on here it’s impossible to know where to begin. For starters, the album is by Willie Sutherland. So which one is Willie? They BOTH look like they just got out of an afternoon of shock therapy to cure them of “unfortunate tendencies” towards unchurchly behavior–probably attending R rated movies or wearing provacative beachwear. Can you picture either one of these yokels wearing a speedo? Perish the very idea.

And what’s with the TIES? Are we getting this album done between shifts working for Col. Sanders or what?

Then there’s the inclusion of the child, precariously wobbling on the pew, waiting for the inevitable head injury. Count your blessings? You mean like being able to get this photo snapped before the tragedy? The worst part of ALL this is the track list. It’s nothing but a bunch of copyright free church hymns you’re already forced to sing every Sunday if you’re goofy enough to haul your ass out of bed to hang out with these dorks. So what’s the incentive to BUY this record?

My favorite part about this cover? The sunglasses. I don’t know why, but it makes me think of Twin Peaks–the Horne brothers scheming away at One-Eyed Jacks. Just look at that smarmy face, already thinking about things far away from this awful album cover. Maybe reposessing a trailer house or sneaking off to to naughty things to the 17-year old prom queen working at the Tastee Freeze.

You Read That Correctly: Vinyl Records For Sale Here

vinyl records for saleTurntabling is on the verge of getting much more active (and cool) with the addition of vinyl LPs for sale and related sundries. We introduced books and a random CD or two back a few months ago to test the response and the results were quite pleasing.

The majority of the music for sale here will be vinyl LPs, but some CDs will also make an appearance. Expect an interesting collection of sounds including Italian horror soundtracks, lounge and bossa nova, new wave/electronic, experimental, any quirky or offbeat stuff we can dig up.

If you have a band with vinyl releases, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with your wholesale prices and a web addy where we can listen to digita samples. Turntabling’s areas of interest are diverse, but we need to hear it before we agree to stock it.

Stay tuned, the first LP titles go up for sale this week before the Labor Day weekend.