Category Archives: editorial

WTF: Ted Nugent Love Grenade

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ted nugent love grenade album cover

Ted Nugent’s cover for the 2007 greatest hits collection, Love Grenade, isn’t just a wretched exercise in horny teenager-style cartooning, it’s also wildly offensive! Just look at how she’s depicted abusing that innocent hand grenade.

Seriously though, rampaging sexism aside, Love Grenade wins top marks–it’s a true accomplishment to  bewilder AND register as blindingly stupid at the same time. A naked woman bound on a food tray with…a grenade in her mouth? That IS a grenade, right? It’s not an under-ripe avocado? Or maybe it’s Ted Nugent’s wallet, fat with all that cash he’s making off another collection of reheated twaddle.

I’m trying hard to figure out what The Nuge is trying to say here–aside from “Hey Kids, here’s a REALLY DUMB record by MEEEEEEE!” And the track listing does nothing to dispel that notion. When you’ve got songs like “Bridge Over Troubled Daughters” and “Broadside” (get it? Huh huh, heh heh, BROAD side…heh heh huh huh) you know you’re not dealing with a Rhodes scholar here.

Whatever happened to the good old days when long haired dorks with guitars sang about SATAN? Continue reading WTF: Ted Nugent Love Grenade →

Skullcandy Lowrider Silver and Red Headphones

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skullcandy lowrider headphones silver and redThis is not a gear review, because frankly we don’t own a pair of these Skullcandy lowrider-style headphones. But the color scheme and design sure is eye-catching and it’s tempting to purchase a pair based on looks alone. A few reviewers mention that these are great for drum-n-bass sounds, which sounds fine to us. If you’re interested purely in style over function, these are pretty sweet. But how do they stand up to the test of the tunes? If you own a pair, we’d love to know–help us decide whether to buy or flee? Drop us a comment, eh? They sure are pretty though. Continue reading Skullcandy Lowrider Silver and Red Headphones →

Peter Hook Spills the Beans on Hacienda, Acid House

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peter hook bbc photoOctober 5th is the day Hooky fans and Manchester sounds lovers alike get a treat. According to a blog post at Junk, Hooky’s new book Hacienda: How Not To Run A Club debuts 10/5 along with an accompanying CD called Hacienda Acid House Classics.

Both releases are pretty exciting for old-school vinyl lovers who still own their original FAC series New Order 12-inch singles and yearn for the glory days of club mismanagement, free-flowing adult refreshment, and non-stop hugs.

Hooky’s been quite the unpredictable sort–in the 90s it didn’t look like he was doing much (even though the album covers for his Revenge side project made for slightly steamy viewing.) but since the days of Pineapple Face Hooky has done Monaco, Man Ray and countless DJ gigs all over the planet.

Presumably, the Hacienda book is a tell-all, and now that Tony Wilson and Rob Gretton are both sadly passed away, Hook is free to dish, but I expect it will be tasteful but likely a tad bitter.

Hacienda: How Not To Run A Club is listed on Amazon.com but it’s not even available for pre-0rder at press time, but as October 5 creeps closer and closer, chances are that will change. Keep checking–we will, too. You CAN pre-order the double-disc set mentioned above, Hacienda Acid House Classics. No word on whether a vinyl version will come out in October or not, but here’s hoping.

Hacienda Acid House Classics

WTF: The Sexual Gospel

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wtf bad album art jesus use me

There is no nice way to say this. Our latest entry in the WTF bad album cover artwork series has so much wrong with it that the LEAST of this record’s worries are the sexual connotations of the title, “Jesus Use Me.” I hear a gospel A&R rep scrambling to the phone to answer for this gaffe, sweating profusely and trying to make nice. “Honest, chief, they meant well, they really really did!”

Now you know where Steve Albini got the inspiration to call his post-Big Black group Shellac. Look at these hairdos! No wonder they named this record after their secret lusts–they were high on the fumes from ten gallons of hairspray and Bondo.

Creepier than the religio-sexual underpinnings? The MATCHING OUTFITS. When a band decides to GO UNIFORM, they usually do it in some kind of flashy Beatle-esque manner. Not these churchly chicas—they raided the thrift store Grandma section and begged their phtoographer to make them RITUALLY UNAPPEALING.

I am DYING to hear what this album sounds like, but I bet I already know–warbling, off-key three part harmonies and one singer with a perpetually stuffy nose. It would be cute if it weren’t so horrifying.

Sorry, folks, we don’t have this gem for sale…but if I ever find a copy, I will snap it up and put it on sale here instantly. Really.